


Drinking Problems

by Nexas_Hart



Series: Nexas Hart's Marvel One-Shots [9]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Fluff, Not all characters tagged in story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-01
Updated: 2020-09-01
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:35:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26228023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nexas_Hart/pseuds/Nexas_Hart
Summary: A conflict has begun in the Compound that has summoned almost all of the Avengers within its walls.There are three sides to every story. Where do you stand?
Relationships: Bruce Banner & Natasha Romanov, Bruce Banner & Tony Stark, Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Natasha Romanov, Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Series: Nexas Hart's Marvel One-Shots [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1897207
Comments: 15
Kudos: 148





	Drinking Problems

**Author's Note:**

> Saw a couple of posts about this a while ago. Recently saw a few fun little sketches about it, too. Hope you enjoy the argument as much as I did.

“C’mon, Bruce. Pick a side.”

“Sorry, Tony.” Doctor Banner walks over to the opposite side of the table.

The billionaire puts a hand over his heart. “Okay, ouch. Betrayed. First Pepper; now you?”

“Tony,” his fiancé sighs. “You can like both, you know?”

“I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that.”

The team is divided. Almost in half, with plenty of other part-time members on holo-screens in the room. Each of them is weighing in on a very important issue. One that may cause the second Avengers’ Civil War.

“C’mon, Bruce,” Tony presses. “We’re scientists. We need coffee to survive. It’s our lifeblood.”

“Like I said,” the doctor sighs. “I’m sorry. That much caffeine just isn’t good for me with the Big Guy constantly in the back of my head. There are plenty of teas that I’ve enjoyed because of their calming effects, as well as the energizing ones. I have to go with this side.”

Leading Team Tea is Stephen Strange and now joined by Bruce Banner. T’Challa has joined through video conference, and has sided with them as well. Loki, despite his hesitance to being in the Compound, has backed the tea side with what little emotion he chooses to display. Pepper, despite Tony’s dramatics, only really supports tea more because she’s gotten a bit tired of Tony’s obsession with the other drink. Most of the Guardians are weighing on Team Tea simply because coffee is pretty much exclusive to Earth, while the process of brewing tea can be found throughout space, even if the leaves used vary from the Terran variety.

Team Coffee has Tony Stark leading the charge, with Thor enthusiastically backing him up. Clint has claimed that being a SHIELD agent with an early schedule, not to mention being a dad, has whole caused his wholehearted support towards the magical bean. Scott’s got the same fatherly reason for his support. Shuri is on her own separate screen from her brother, supporting the wonders of coffee while glaring at the King of Wakanda. Steve and Bucky got hooked when they were in the army. Bucky, though, has decided not to pick a side due to being converted to the taste of tea by T'Challa and the other Wakandans while he was recuperating in their country. Rhodey’s in DC, while Carol is off world, but both are siding with Tony with their own holographic representations.

“Strange,” Tony tries coerce the Sorcerer Supreme once more. “C’mon. You’re a former medical doctor. How could you forget about those late-night study sessions during your college finals? Wasn’t it coffee that got you through them?”

“No,” the wizard replies calmly. “As a matter of fact, it was a photographic memory and actually good study habits that did that.”

“Ah, makes sense,” the engineer nods in understanding. “It takes a no fun stiff in order to like that flavored leaf water.”

“Please,” Loki snorts. “Better to have an actual civilized drink than your tasteless bean juice. Most of you humans need to water it down with unholy amounts of sweeteners and flavorings merely to endure the taste.”

“And have there been very many successful drinking establishments and enterprises based entirely around your drink?” Tony counters. “If it was actually something that people would want to drink, don’t you think the money-grubbing capitalists would’ve dipped their toes into it? But they don’t. Instead, it’s just a footnote in the history of drinks compared to coffee.”

“You know,” Shuri smiles on her screen. “Okeye’s been wanted a Starbucks in Wakanda. She’s on my side with this argument.”

“So I’ve heard,” T’Challa sighs. “But I will not have one of the first outside influences allowed in our nation be a drink chain, and the elders, and mother, agree with me on the subject.”

Shuri just waves her brother off as the two sides begin to make their increasingly emotional arguments towards their preferred drinks. Voices begin to raise, the seated start standing, and Bruce leaves to keep from getting too stressed from the whole thing.

***

Peter Parker looks at where Doctor Banner leaves, taking a sip out of his own mug while sitting on the kitchen counter. He looks over to his companion.

“Are you going after him?”

“In a bit,” Natasha Romanov replies, sipping her own mug of steaming drink. “He always wants a few minutes to cool off before anyone approaches him, just to be sure he doesn’t accidentally hurt them.” She motions towards the group. “Not going to pick a side?”

“Aunt May says I don’t need anymore energy, so coffee’s out, and I’ve never been a very big tea fan like MJ is. What about you?”

“Coffee never interested me after I’d come out of the Red Room. People seemed so reliant on it that it just never sat well with me. By the time I’d really understood it, I’d gotten used to being without it. The smell never endeared me to it either. If I had to choose, I’d pick tea, but I’d never really been enthusiastic about it like Bruce is. He got really into the varieties during his travels. Besides, it’s more fun to watch from the sidelines as everyone dukes it out.”

Peter finishes off his drink as he watches the argument proceed in front of him. Despite the conflict being pretty intense, he does agree that it’s really entertaining. The spider next to him seems to share the sentiment. As he looks down at his empty mug, Nat says something.

“More hot chocolate?”

He smiles up at her, offering his mug. “Yes please.”

She takes it and goes over to mix another batch for the both of them. Adding in the whipped cream and sprinkles that they both feel no shame in enjoying. She brings them back over and hands him his drink.

“To Team Hot Chocolate,” she holds out her own mug.

Peter clinks his mug to hers while the chaos continues to escalate in front of them.

**Author's Note:**

> I am firmly planted in Team Hot Chocolate. I don't drink tea or coffee. No offense meant to anyone who does, I just don't like them. Hope you liked my little piece on the subject.
> 
> Comments and Kudos. Don't be mean.


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